Dear Survivor,
Silence taught us to hold back. Now self-trust asks us to listen, to tap in, and to be present.
This can feel tedious, even terrifying. For many of us, one of the worst parts of being abused as children wasn’t just what happened, it was what it taught us about ourselves, about life, and about people in general. Abuse told us our bodies couldn’t be trusted. That our gut feelings were wrong. That when something screamed “danger” inside, we had to stay anyway.
I lived in that space for years. I distrusted every feeling, doubted every decision, second-guessed every instinct, contested every quiet voice inside. Abuse taught me to escape my body. Chronic illness taught me to ignore my body. Survival taught me to disconnect from it.
But healing? Healing has been learning to hear, and honor, the signals I once silenced.
Why We Stop Listening
If you’ve ever felt this, you’re not alone:
- Your stomach gets queasy, but you tell yourself you’re being dramatic.
- Your chest feels tight, but you smile to keep others comfortable.
- Your gut says “this isn’t right,” but fear silence and convinces you that no one will believe you.
This is what trauma does. It trains us to ignore the alarm system God placed inside us. To believe our bodies are liars. To stop trusting ourselves, even when we’re in danger.
But here’s what I’ve learned, and I’m still learning: your body has been trying to protect you all along.
The Way Back Home
Your body isn’t lying to you. It’s speaking.
That racing heartbeat? The knot in your stomach? The bone-deep fatigue? The need to get away? These aren’t problems. They’re messages. They’re signals that something inside you still knows how to keep you safe.
Listening doesn’t mean you’ll always understand immediately. It means practicing a new way: treating your body as a friend instead of an enemy.
What This Looks Like Every Day
Here’s what I’m learning, and what you can try:
- Stop when you feel something. Don’t rush past it.
- Name it out loud. “My chest feels tight.” “My stomach hurts.” “I feel like running.”
- Ask gently. “What are you trying to tell me?”
- Listen and act. If your gut says “don’t go,” trust that. If your body says “rest,” let yourself rest without guilt.
Self-trust isn’t about being perfect. It’s about practice.
A Story That Changed Everything
I used to get sick to my stomach every time I had to see a certain “family member.” For years, I told myself I was being weak and unforgiving. I pushed through to appease others.
Then one day, against every instinct screaming “no,” I picked up my childhood abuser at the airport to please family. That day, I miscarried my first child, the baby I desperately wanted, the moment I laid eyes on that man.
My body wasn’t betraying me. It was warning me, protecting me, but I ignored it, and the cost was devastating.
That loss taught me this truth: ignoring your body can cost more than you’re willing to pay.
Now, when my body speaks, I listen, not with fear, but with reverence. My body remembers what happened. And it remembers how to protect me.
What God Says About Your Body
“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you…?” – 1 Corinthians 6:19
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” – Proverbs 3:5–6.
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” — Proverbs 4:23
Your body is not your enemy. It is a temple. A place where the Spirit dwells.
Listening to your body isn’t about trusting yourself instead of God. It’s about trusting that the God who lives in you also speaks through you.
Your body is holy ground. And your heart is your compass. Guard it, not with silence or fear, but with wisdom.
Simple Ways to Start Today
- Check in with yourself. Three times today, pause and ask: “How does my body feel right now?”
- Notice without judgment. Don’t say, “I shouldn’t feel this way.” Just notice.
- Thank your body. It’s been working hard to protect you, even when you didn’t realize it.
- Start small. If your body says “water,” drink. If it says “rest,” rest. Practice with little steps first.
Get Honest with Yourself
- When was a time I ignored my body’s signals and regretted it?
- When was a time I honored my body’s signals and it protected me?
- What signals is my body sending me right now that I’ve been dismissing?
The Truth You Need to Hear
Dear Survivor, your body is not a liar.
Your instincts are not broken.
Your signals are not shameful, they are sacred.
They are a compass, guiding you toward safety, healing, and trust.
So today, So before you dismiss that knot in your stomach, the tight chest, the weary sigh, stop. Listen. Trust.
You’re not just healing your voice. You’re healing the language your body speaks, too.
Welcome back to yourself, Disruptor.
From my heart to yours. Journey with me as I/we Journey 2 Free
Larissa.
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